Things seem familiar when they are favorable and don’t challenge our beliefs. We like to take the driver seat to control the environment. We like to live in a cocoon of our own beliefs created to make us feel comfortable and ignore all other possible means to come near the reality. Most educated people become the most irrational when challenged about their mindset. You can awake a person who is sleeping but not the one pretending to sleep.

Why Reality Don’t Change Your Mindset Rather Emotion Rules

It’s our everyday fight when we struggle with our own mindset to make our life stress free. Cause of stress may be anything such as an exhausting work schedule, financial insecurity, health issue or a rocky relationship, anything that puts high demands on you can be stressful to us and reduce our real potential.  Let’s understand why facts don’t change our mindset and explore the dynamics of factors that make it change in this article.

Logic behind belief

Our actions in daily life inspired by our belief system more than any logic. if individual logic is different from a widely accepted belief than there is a huge possibility of disappointment and may struggle to perform hassle-free actions.

It is not necessary that common belief shall be always true to follow. We humans are social animals and want to fit in our society by following this simple step of blend in by going with mass belief concepts. Curiosity makes us progressive and for which we always run after the truth but so is the social belief. Normally this works well together however sometimes comes into conflict.

In a Conflict situation it is very convenient to accept social belief than understanding the truth of a particular fact or idea. When we accept the herd belief system we are accepted by large group of people rather than the only very few truth seekers.

We don’t always accept and believe things because they are correct. Sometimes we believe things because they make us look good to the people we care about.

Famous Cognitive Science experiment of Ivan Pavlov explains this fact very well, If a brain anticipates that it will be rewarded for adopting a particular belief system and fact, it’s perfectly happy to do so, and doesn’t much care where the reward comes from. Initially when the scientist started giving food with a ringing bell the dog associated with the reward system of the belief that ringing means food, same as we human being trained ourselves in our long history that a social belief’s acceptance will be rewarded with more friends.

What melts our minds?

As social animals, we all need love,  affection, and care whether it comes naturally or we work around it. Emotions are the major factor that melts our mindset.

To understand this let’s take the help of India’s most famous Epic of Mahabharat. Karan was an excellent archer and could possibly make any rival to bend his knees in front of him but he wasn’t socially accepted in society as a Warrior due to his low caste descent.  So when he challenged publicly accepted ace archer Arjun to have a dual with him to prove his supremacy but no one gave heed except Duryodhan.  The one act of acceptance by Duryodhan made Karan associated with him life long and laid down his own life despite knowing the fact that he is doing wrong by standing Duryodhan side.

The way to change people’s minds is to become friends with them, to integrate them into your social group, to bring them into your circle. Now, they can change their beliefs without the risk of being abandoned socially.

Emotions attached to a relationship melts our mind even if it is not the truth.

It is a very common phenomenon that if someone believes your logic, you automatically tend to lean forward in acceptance with his/her every idea

Why false belief survive?

Wrong beliefs and ideas spread like a wildfire, nobody really knows about the origin but it surely does affect the masses. Any ideas survive when it is repeatedly discussed among people. Silence is the Death of an idea, an idea that is never spoken or documented will die with the person who conceived it.

False ideas float for long it’s not only because we like to follow them but also that we discuss them to criticize. we give reference of a bad idea to complain about it and this way we keep it alive for centuries. We can understand this with daily life examples of viral posts or videos, When something fake comes in front of us we don’t ignore it rather we discuss it and share with our friends and we make it more famous than it supposes to be just by making reference to a complaint about it.

Intellectual superiority push you to respond

People always believe that they should oppose what is wrong, our intellectual superiority pushes us to confront the fake idea and we believe that the world would be a better place to live with the one less fake idea. If the goal is to actually change minds, then I don’t believe criticizing the other side is the best approach.

Most of us argue to win not to learn, one famous Japani writer wrote ” Always remember that to argue, and win, is to break down the reality of the person you are arguing against. It is painful to lose your reality, so be kind, even if you are right”


As humans we need a sense of belongingness to likewise people. We accept a common belief system of society to not left out alone. Our insecurities make us stick with the beliefs which are comfortable for us to keep us attached with our Society. Individual emotions play a vital role in forming our mindset and we wish to keep those emotions intact even at a steep cost of our mental or physical health. Our false beliefs survive because we keep them repeating wanted or unwantedly. Mindset changes with acceptance rather than argument.

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